My war on drugs. I mean, slugs.

The last few weeks have been dedicated to getting these living boogers out of my garden. I was warned about their prolific presence in the northwest but naively thought that maybe they’d stay away on their own? The slugs almost completely destroyed our lettuce crop and ate one of our zucchini plants (but wouldn’t touch the other – how strange), so I’ve been employing various weapons in my arsenal of destruction.

First, I’ve flipped my watering schedule from an evening routine to a morning routine. I read that this change alone is supposed to decrease slug activity by 80% since the dirt will be dry by nighttime, making it harder for them to forage and feed. This has been the most difficult adjustment as those who know me have learned that I love SLEEP more than most other things. I was actually pleased to see it was raining this morning because it meant I could sleep in an extra 15 minutes – nature is watering the garden for me!

I’ve (mostly) lined the garden plot with copper tape. The tape is supposed to deliver a small shock to the slug’s membrane, deterring their entrance to the plot. Conversely, this can also trap slugs within the plot but I’m willing to take that chance.

Two small bowls filled with beer now sit next to the troubled plants. The slugs are attracted to the beer, crawl up the sides, fall in and drown. Death by beer. So far, the slugs appear to prefer Heineken over Fat Tire.

I’ve spread a garlic mixture near the base of the troubled plants. I think this has made a difference – after I spread the mixture, I’ve noticed a dramatic decrease in the number of slugs caught in the beer traps. But maybe they are getting too smart?

All this effort is in the name of keeping the garden free of pesticides. Yes, I’m aware that I could buy slug poison and kill loads of them, but I’m determined to keep that stuff out of the plot. I also could go on a midnight search-and-destroy expedition but, as we’ve already established, I love sleep. Plus, washing slug gunk off my hands ranks pretty low on my list of things I want to put myself through (and I’m honestly a little afraid of what I’d find out there at midnight). So where there’s a will there’s a way! Kill the trespassers!